Hey all, Kelby McFurryballs here again, coming to you from the mean streets of Berlin. Well, it turns out that my stable of hookers from last year have all been arrested and deported, so I've been spending my days drinking boxed wine behind a bench in a city park and my nights at techno bars trying to hear over the music. I really, really should be heading back to America soon, but German strippers are just too skanky to walk away from.

It's in the street outside a particularly seedy nudie bar in South Berlin that I meet Claus, a self-proclaimed semi-instafamous actor in the German film industry, and a fellow of the feline persuasion. After watching him try, and fail, to pick up some barfly girls with an atrocious fake Scottish accent and a terribly bad photoshopped picture of him with someone else's Porsche, I suspect Claus' media resume leans towards "volunteer usher at a community theater but I once was an extra in a movie being filmed in my town". I don't care, however, because Claus knows a guy who is driving down to Rome later today, he can get me a shotgun-ride if I'm up for it. But the catch is that I have to let Claus review a movie he was in back in 2016. Well, Bradley always said MMT needed more guest reviewers, so, why the hell not, right?

Man, that was a mistake. Luckily for me, Claus' friend is still willing to give me a ride to Italy tonight, so I'm out of here. Hopefully I can nap the ride away, it's been a long day.

The End.

Written in May 2019 by Kelby McFurryballs.

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